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The First Terrorist Olympiad

The Alliance wonders “What events will be featured in the Terrorist Olympics?” My predictions for a few events we might see:

  • Synchronized Car Swarming
  • Circular Firing Squad
  • Ululation Marathon
  • 400 Meter Wife Beating Relay
  • Molotov Cocktail Shotput
  • Jihadi Biathlon (5 km tunnel crawl & suicide pizzeria attack)
  • 100 Meter Hellfire Missile Evasion
  • Bomb Vest Powerlifting
  • Bulldozer Diving
  • Foot Marksmanship