SpongeBob SquarePants is a manly sponge

Can we all stop fussing over SpongeBob SquarePants and his alleged dalliances with Patrick the Starfish or other male toons, please?

SpongeBob is a manly sponge

He’s a manly sponge, and definitely not gay. If you have further photoshopped evidence of this, please send it my way (me at brainshavings dot com) and I’ll post it here.

Here’s one from Matt Naugle at The Open End, showing that SpongeBob doesn’t hang around in seedy “bars-of-alternative-lifestyle-choice”:

I’m sure the triangle button is just a fashion oversight. Um, what triangle button? Ha!

Here’s one from pamibe. I never knew SpongeBob started out in Westerns.

SpongeBob and The Duke

He must be older than he looks. How did Maureen O’Hara resist his charms?

Update: AC/DC has a new guitarist.


  1. The Open End

    SpongeBob SquarePants is a manly sponge, darnit!

    There has been some fuss by Focus on the Family that SpongeBob is not heterosexual. They might have a point that the video sounds questionable, but immorality is so common in pop culture that this video is incredibly harmless. What ever happened to the…

  2. Matt N.

    How on earth did I miss that? Thats what I get for using google’s image search- I honestly didn’t even see that.
    It is now updated on my site. I am an EEEEDIOT!

  3. Chet

    What’s this deal where manly = heterosexual? For that matter, why does manly = promiscuous, as implied by the funny photo? Doesn’t a “real man” keep his promises, stay true, etc?
    I realize we’re just being funny, and it is, but I thought you guys were on the side of traditional morals and all. If you wanted to portray the Square One as manly and moral and all that, why stick him with the Hooters girls?

  4. Chet

    Remind me again which side in the culture war is the one that’s so humorless that it must have a stick up its nether regions?
    Did I say it wasn’t funny? The problem is that the mode of your humor betrays cultural attitudes that aren’t in the least bit funny, or for that matter, don’t quite jibe with the supposed monopoly on morals you guys claim to have.
    How funny did you find “Farenheight 9/11”, btw? How often do I hear you conservatives complaining about liberal attitudes on The Daily Show? There’s no shortage of humorlessness on either side of the aisle. And I did think it was funny. Does that mean I have to turn my brain off?